Why Should Anybody Listen to You?

We live in a world where attention and trust are two of the most valuable investments on earth.

Undivided attention at that is even rarer.

Why should anyone stop their scrolling, endless email, and relentless worrying to listen to you?

They shouldn't.

I'm going to reverse engineer this.

You should listen to them.

Image by Nimura daisuke｜Artworks on tumblr

People listen to you when they feel understood, seen, and especially if they think you are similar.

Have you ever noticed influencers asking subscribers to share where they're from in the comment section on YouTube?

Social media algorithms love engagement (i.e. commenting) and people love to share part of who they are.

Language, location, cultural references, and food, etc. are all common ways to bridge a gap, build a connection and ultimately build trust.

This creates a feeling of being understood and implicit trust. Those subscribers feel seen, heard, and included and I bet are more likely to engage.

Other people, the folks you hope will pay attention to you, don't listen until they are first heard.

Before I hope a client listens to me, I first invite them to speak.

I want to know who they are.

I want to know what they care about.

I want to know where they're stuck and listen deeply enough to build rapport such that when I do speak, they trust me.

They listen.

They want more.

Authority is a gift, a responsibility, and a skill you actively cultivate.

First, listen.

When you do speak, have something of value to offer that is deeply relevant to their worldview and problem.

Be the wisest and most experienced person in the room on that topic. Be someone you would call up to solve that specific problem.

I can speak at great length about authenticity, branding, finding your voice, strategy, confidence, one on one relationships, culture, and the like because I have high levels of recognizable success in these areas.

I would call and hire myself about each of these topics.

Can you say the same?

Nobody owes you their attention.

You earn it.

It starts by listening.

Speak only after you understand the person standing in front of you.

If you want people to listen to you, you'll soon realize it isn't about you. It's about them.

Your number of followers, your all-star clients, and the millions of dollars you made are all reflections of your authority, but they aren't the authority itself.

You could be a babbling idiot who has 500k followers, was sponsored by Gucci, and worked with a handful of famous people. ​

This could very well mean you are an authority on creating that specific outcome.

But I don't believe you can divorce the person from the action, outcome, or blueprint.

This is why I care more about who the person is and subsequently what they achieve. For if I'm not willing to be or act like them, I am less likely to follow their advice (or alleged authority).

True authority goes beyond metrics and takes into consideration who you're being in the process.

Remember last week's column? It matters if people like you.

First, you listen.

Then you speak.

And when you speak, you drop $100 bills with every word.

Go get 'em,

Lalita